ModestGeniusXL

When a Stranger Calls

Most of the time when it comes to remakes, I've at least heard of the original and probably even seen it.  That doesn't mean that the remake is always better though.  Here is a case where I only remember the premise of the original and can't recall anything about the movie itself to compare it to the remake.  Maybe that's where this one caught a break in my eyes.

This new verison of "When a Stranger Calls" sees our victim being a babysitter alone in a house when she's stalked by an anonymous psycho.  A cute babysitter in a big house by herself...there's a fresh idea.

This flick annoyed me from the beginning.  Well not quite the very beginning.  The opening sequence wasn't bad as it set up this killer's MO.  However, after that is when it goes downhill.  The cops eventually come to the murder scene and the lead detective shows up.  He's an older guy that looks like he's been around for years.  Of course they never show the murder scene itself, but they show his reaction.  He's so repulsed that he looks like he wants to puke.  At his age, I find it hard to believe that whatever it was was so bad that even he couldn't stomach it.

Speaking of not showing anything, they did that all throughout this movie.  There were a few murders that take place but we never see any blood and they never show how the people were offed.  That's one good way to maintain a PG-13 rating.

Unlike other babysitter movies, the sitter's not totally alone in the house.  The live-in housekeeper was there also.  Until she was taken out, that is.  The first thing I was thinking is what was the purpose of the babysitter in the first place if they're already paying Alice?

They try their best to hit us with all the cliche suspenseful camera views and especially the typical horror movie music.  It's all good for effort; nevertheless, when you don't tread any new ground, you gets no props in my book.

Teandra had pointed out that what she didn't like about the movie is we never find out who the guy is.  I think what she meant is it would have been nice if the guy was somehow linked to the sitter in some way.  Why was he stalking her? Was he a psycho ex?  The troubled son of the family she was sitting for?  That's the one part of the movie I did like is that they don't expound on it.  He's just some random, psychotic stalker and I'm fine with that.  At any rate, I'm still thinking that the original was probably still better.

My rating:  C-

American Pie Presents...Band Camp

Whenever they talk about releasing a sequel to a movie straight to dvd, you know that can't be good.  They can try to use all the rationale they want talking about how it maximizes profits and it can get quicker distribution.  The fact is, it's going there because it's basically an inferior product.  Such is the case here.

The "American Pie" movies were credited with revitalizing the genre of the teen raunch movies.  "Porky's" made it famous when it hit the scene in the 80s, but then it pretty much died out.  Along came the first "American Pie" carving a niche that had been forgotten and could almost be considered a sleeper hit.  Its sequel was just as good.  The third was a stretch, but still not that bad.  They really should have quit while they were ahead.

"American Pie Presents Band Camp" tried to capitalize on its predecessors fame by using some of the ideas that made the others famous.  The only "stars" who returns in this one are Eugene Levy and Chris Owen, better known as Sherman. However, they attempt to keep the "one time at band camp" gag going with the premise of the title alone.  It could have been a good idea if it was done well.

Where they really screwed up is having the main character be a Stifler sibling.  It was no secret that Sean William Scott as Steve Stifler was the secret behind the success of the AP movies.  Sure, the pie bit in the first one didn't hurt, but it was Scott's wit that made the flicks what they were.  Having a flea market rip off of him in this one wasn't enough to cut it.  In fact, he was so over the top as a wannabe Sean William Scott that he only comes across as annoying.

I realize this is a comedy, but they could have at least tried to make it somewhat plausible.  What camp of ANY kind has counselors who look like they came straight out of the pages of Playboy? 

As I was watching this horrific excuse for a movie, I was sitting there trying to think of any straight to dvd sequel that I've ever seen that was worth watching.  I couldn't.  Bearing that in mind, I don't know why I thought this one would be any different.  Its only saving grace was it's somewhat clever ending.  Other than that, it was pretty much a waste of time.  This one might as well be known as the taint of the "American Pie" series.  And I mean that in more than one way.

My rating:  D-

Loser of the Week

As usual, there were a few good qualified candidates for the spot this week.  I had narrowed it down to two finalists.  One of them being the Kansas City Royals.  No, I can't stand baseball, but I can't help but notice how they've been getting bashed in the news lately and deservedly so.  They're currently at a league worst 11-35 for a record.  At the pace they're on, they could possibly go down in history having the worst record in the history of Major League Baseball.  Let's hope they swing for the fences and do something right by actually getting that distinction.

Fortunately, for them, they were only runner-up.  The title this week belongs to none other than former Enron CEOs Ken Lay and Jeffrey Skilling, the self-proclaimed "smartest guys in the room".

The jurors returned from deliberating this week and handed down a guilty verdict for both of them on ALL counts.  The sentencing part still has to take place but they will be serving a minimum 20-year sentence with a possibility of 30 years.  At their ages, that will most likely be the rest of their natural born lives. That's just how it should be.

Naturally, Kenny Boy had the nerve to sit there and say that he still believes he's innocent.  You've got to be kidding me?!  They all sat there and intentionally mis-lead employees and investors about the current state of their company.  He was talking people into putting more money into Enron stock while he's selling his shares to get as much money as possible.  There are people who lost THOUSANDS of dollars from their 401(k) retirement plans while he comes out as a multi-millionaire.  Personally, I'm thinking prison isn't good enough for them.  Certainly not the cushy white collar one that they'll probably end up at.

The sad part is you know their attorneys will waste even more of our tax dollars trying to get this whole thing tied up in the appeal process.  And because of all the loot these jerks have, they'll be free the entire time.  Then when they run out of appeals and do actually end up serving time, it will probably be bargained down and cut down even more because of "good behavior" to where they end up doing 10 years or so.

I think their punishment should be equal to that of what they inflicted on everyone else. Yes, they still do prison time.  Yes, it should be 20 years minimum.  But then after they get out, if they're still alive, they shouldn't be left with a penny to live on.  If they want the finer things in life-- like food, water, shelter -- they have to work for it.  And make them work at the worst McDonalds ever.  Put them at one deep in the hood and give them the graveyard shift.

I've heard some people say they should get the death penalty for what they've done.  I've even heard others say that it's unfair how they got that type of jail time after OJ gets to walk for what he "allegedly" did.  Well the system is what it is.  God will give eventually pass His judgment on them.  Until them, they remain the epitome of the word loser.

A Partial Reunion (Home Again)

The time I had been looking forward to for the past couple of weeks had finally arrived.  Our annual mid-year reunion in Kansas City.  And this year, according to the outpouring of e-mails among all the cousins, it looked like it would be the biggest turnout for the KC reunion that we've had in a while.  I was so pumped that I took Friday off anticipating this so I could get down there early.

Just to give a real brief bit of backstory for those who aren't in the know, this is one of two reunions.  With a family our size, we decided to maximize our time together and do it twice a year.  The major one will be Labor Day weekend in Arkansas.  That's another one I look forward to.  That one is going to have it's own photo album on here.  This one could have its own if I didn't have to cut it short.  I'll address that later.

When I got into town (Kansas City, that is) Friday, I found that I had jumped the gun a bit and most of the Arkansas contingent was just getting in and getting settled in their hotels.  I had a bit of time before the fish fry at Popoo and Grandma's so I had to make the mandatory stop at Gates while I was in town.  True, I didn't need it since I knew Grandma would be making plenty of food, but come on...I can't go to KC without stopping by Gates.

I really don't have a favorite Gates location.  There all pretty much the same.  However, this one is on the Kansas side and is always the easiest for me to find so it's where I usually end up.  I was also surprised to find out the other day that not everyone who has had Gates thinks it's the best barbecue they've ever had.  Anyone who doesn't think that would have to be a recovering crack addict.

After that, I still had some free time so the next stop was my favorite men's clothing store: Harold Pener's.  There used to be one not very far from the Gates in what was once Indian Springs Mall.  The mall now is a shell of its former self.  It was once a prestigious mall filled with a variety of stores.  Over the years, it's deteriorated to the point where you can count the number of stores there on one hand.  It's really pretty sad.  I can still remember taking trips there with Grandma on the Minibus as a shorty to check out Tuesday matinees.  No theater there anymore.  No Harold Peners.  No class.  I honestly don't know why they now just don't tear it all down and put it out of its misery.

Instead, I had to go to the other Peners location on the Missouri side.  That worked out alright though since it was close to Auntie Linda's place.  It may not look like much on the outside, but they've got the best selection for men's clothes that I've ever seen.  Casual clothes that is.  If someone could just talk them ubto expanding to Des Moines.

It was finally time for the fish fry.  The thing about a family our size is that I often forget the names of the cousins younger than me.  I know all of the what we call second generation cousins.  That's my age group.  We all grew up together at the KC and Arkansas reunions thru the years.  However, as we got older, a lot of us cut down on our frequency of attendance.  Then we started having shorties and they got older.  Now there's little, little cousins I don't recognize at all.  That's not even counting the next generation below me that I knew as children and now they're all grown and I hardly recognize them.

Some of us don't change much thru the years so I've always got the old reliables.  Here's my cousin Reggie that I had spoken of in an earlier blog entry.  For those of you that skim over the sports entries (or the lengthy entries...but that would mean you're skipping this one too), he's the one who was on the Arkansas national championship squad.  He's on the far right.  With him is John Swayze and Mike.

My cousin Earl came thru later.  I ended up spending the night at his place, where the next day's barbecue would be held.  I wish I would have got a pic of his house but we got there in the middle of the night so it was too dark.  PHAT crib tho.  He's a modest one, but he's doing good for himself.  As a matter of fact, instead of giving a short blurb here that won't do him full justice, I'm going to give him the shout out he deserves on his birthday coming up next month.

Unfortunately, something came up with Mariah that I had to take care of in Cedar Rapids.  Because of that, I had to cut my time short and head to CR early this morning.  My plan was to take care of my business and then turn right around and head back to KC to finish out the family activities.  I don't know what I was thinking.  Maybe 10 years ago, my body could have sustained that type of lack of rest.  Not now.  I was entirely too worn out to make the drive back to KC.  I barely made it back to Des Moines.  Now I'm looking forward to the Arkansas reunion even more.

Be Careful...I'm a Tooth Chipper

Does anyone remember that hilarious line from "The Nutty Professor"?  I think of that everytime I have this mishap, even though when Eddie uses it, it's meant in a different context.

A couple of years ago, I was attending a Hootie and the Blowfish concert with the fam and E and his fam.  For it to be a free concert, it wasn't bad at all.  Anyway, during one of the songs he was performing that I didn't know, I was sitting there biting my nails as I will do from time to time.  This time, I noticed a piece of fingernail that was a little bit harder than most.  I spit it out and found that it was part of my tooth!  I ran to the restroom and found that I had chipped one of my front teeth and it was visibly obvious.  My beautiful smile was tainted.

Immediately, I'm sitting there thinking about how feeble my teeth must be that they can chip that easily.  I then start realizing how little milk I drink and probably don't get near as much calcium as I should.  And naturally, I'm realizing more and more how old I really am getting.

So I go to the dentist to get the little problem fixed.  I was a little a leery at first because I just knew with my luck that I would hear them tell me something like they'd have to get rid of the tooth and put a gold tooth in it's place.  Then I've also got visions of Steve Martin's turn as a sadistic dentist in "Little Shop of Horrors".  I could see me messing around and getting that guy as my dentist.  Fortunately, mine was a normal guy and they were able to fix the problem good as new.  Anyone who didn't know any better could never tell that it had been chipped.

You'd think I would have learned my lesson from that incident, right?  Nope, I would still occasionally bite my nails periodically.  Oddly enough, I noticed I do it even moreso when something is weighing heavily on me.  If you can't tell, things weigh heavy on me a lot.  As a result of this nervous habit, I've had to go back to the dentist twice now ever since the first incident.  It's getting to be a regular thing where it's almost a once-ever-six-months visit.

I just went back this most recent time to my regular dentist here in Des Moines.  During the process, I noticed something again that I had picked up on in my last visit.  The dentist and his assistant will sit there and have a regular conversation between the two of them like I'm not even there while they're working on my choppers.  Even disclosing personal information about their home lives to this perfect stranger.  Anyone else have that experience when they're at the dentist?  I thought it was pretty interesting.  Then he would say something to me and I still wasn't sure if he was talking to me or to the assistant.

For now, the teeth are back to normal again.  I used to think that I had such great teeth that I'd never have to face the fact of getting dentures when I get older.  Doesn't look like that will be the case now.  Of course, if I do have to go that route, they'll be so flawless that no one would ever know.  And I'll never tell.

Didn't See It Coming

Well almost.  I mean a lot of people really didn't see Michael McDonald, Jr. winning the whole thing but that's because earlier on, it was a foregone conclusion that Baldie was going to be the hands down favorite.  After he was railroaded, then it became evident that they were clearing the way for MMJ.

So apparently over 63 million people voted for this guy.  And apparently that's more people than voted for the last president.  Neither one of those feats are really saying much.  Look at the choices they were left with?  And I mean in both instances: for the American Idol and for our nation's president.

Again, I stayed true to my word and didn't watch any of the two hour finale.  Come to find out when E called that I could have just kicked myself in the head for being so obstinate.  I guess I ended up missing performances from two of my favorite artists in Prince and Mary J. Blige.  According to E, one of the best Prince performances he's ever seen.  At least I've seen him live in concert so anything that I now see on tv of him really pales in comparison.

At least the whole travesty known as American Idol is finally over.  Now they can finally go back to keeping the karaoke in the bars where it belongs.  Hopefully, next season the judges will return to putting real talent in the ranks of the finalists.  Unfortunately, they sometimes don't have a lot to pick from.

The problem with shows like this is even though it claims to be finding the best talent from all over the country, that's not really the case.  Think about it...the people that do make it are the ones who are willing to wait for hours and hours for a chance to audition.  Add to that the fact that there's an age limit (even though that doesn't seem to be apparent now with 90-year-old MMJ winning it all).  Do you really think the most talented untapped artists are going to sift thru all that?  Why would they when they could just go to a record label themselves and invest some time to be heard?

Plus, the "winners" of the show get corralled into ridiculous contracts that could stifle an otherwise promising career.  Take even this year's travesty, Baldie, for instance.  It was announced that the group Fuel wanted him as their front man.  He could get with a known group with an already built in fan-base.  However, AI won't allow that to happen because he's bound by contract to them.  Actually, that may work out better for him.  Having a solo career, he won't have to split the money up a few different ways with fellow group members.  However, who knows how jacked up his contract is with AI so he would have probably been better off with Fuel.  But that is the cutthroat world of the record industry anyway.

So America has spoken and MMJ is the new idol.  I refuse to even mention him by name as he doesn't deserve that distinction.  I can't wait until the whole AI hangover wears off after his first solo album and everyone comes to the realization that "we voted for HIM?!"  All the meanwhile, Baldie will be reigning supreme with twice as much talent. 

To the East Blackwards. Long Overdue...

My monthly issue of Vibe just came and I was perusing the pages for all the latest news in the entertainment world.  Granted, most of it really isn't news anymore since the mag only comes out once a month.  However, every now and then, I'll come across some nuggets that I wasn't aware of.  This was one of those instances.

In their obits section, they announced the passing of Professor X of the legendary hip-hop group X-Clan.  He died March 17th from a bout with meningitis.

As a member of X-Clan, the group stood as  a stark contrast to the west coast gangsta rap that reigned at the time.  They may not have been a huge commercial success, but they were a staple among hip hop connoisseurs of the early 90s.  This is back when there was still such a thing as conscious hip-hop and the artists were genuinely interested in educating  while entertaining at the same time.  X-Clan preached Black Nationalist philosophy in their rhymes and encouraged Black pride and cultural awareness.

X-Clan had always been and remains to be to this day one of my favorite hip hop groups of all time.  They only released two albums in the short span of their career which were "Blackwards" in 1990 and "Xodus" in 1992.  Those two remain still remain classics.  Their timeless and poignant lyrics transcend the era which they came from much as Carter G. Woodson's "Mis-Education of the Negro" remains relevant decades after it was originally published.

Professor X's role in the group could almost be considered as a hype man sans the yelling and screaming.  Brother J would lay down the impactful lyrics and X would interject periodically with his words of wisdom.  Both of them had just the right vocal inflections that lends itself to good hip hop.

The group would eventually disband shortly after their second album.  They announced a comeback in December 2005 that to date, doesn't appear to have ever happened.  It's a shame too because they still remain one of the best things to ever happen to hip-hop.

Unfortunately, X-Clan is no stranger to tragedy.  Soon after the group disbanded, group member Sugar Shaft passed from complications related to AIDS.

Despite the fact that he may have borrowed the name of one of the most famous X-Men of all time, I will always remember the contributions X provided the music world.  X-Clan's music still blesses my Zen to this day.  Too bad hip-hop today couldn't still be as relevant as it was when they were still vainglorious.

You are SOOOO Good Lookin'!

Remember the classic Seinfeld episode regarding the sneeze?  Well that's an unfair question for two reasons.  First, there were WAY too many Seinfeld episodes that can be deemed as classics to actually know which one I'm referring to.  Secondly, there were actually two that contained a reference to sneezing where that was a focal point of the episode.  If you're a true Seinfeld aficionado, you will know right off the bat from the title, which one I'm referring to.

Long story short, the Seinfeld gang had surmised that when you sneeze, why say "God bless you"?  They didn't go into the religious overtones of it, but they agreed that it's better off to say "You're so good lookin'". 

I've long been an opponent of the saying "God bless you" thing when people sneeze too.  A lot of people just say it as an unconscious reflex and don't have any idea where it came from.  There are two schools of thought as to why it's done.  The first is the historical reference behind it.  In earlier times, it was believed that when you sneezed, you opened yourself and your soul to the outside world.  It was an unnatural and certainly a bizarre happening and clearly portended evil.  It was thought that your soul might escape, or demons and evil spirits might get in, or even that they may have caused the sneeze in the first place.  The blessing was to help ward off such badness. 

The second philosophy was a scientific one in that people had perpetuated the myth that when you sneeze, your heart stops so that's why the blessing was given.  This has been discounted by doctors.  It has been proven that a sneeze itself is a very brief event, occurring in a shorter time than a heartbeat.  I did even more reserach and found doctors indicate that heart beats because a small part of it called the SA node that has a "pacemaker" activity.  What this means is that there is a type of electrical cycle going on that triggers beats roughly once every second.  Sneezing does not change the electrical cycle so the heart keeps beating.

In essence, the common "God bless you" phrase after a sneeze wouldn't seem appropriate when you consider the context in which it's being used.  But if you don't say anything, are you just being flat out rude?  That then brings up the other Seinfeld episode that comes to mind where George blesses the wife's sneeze because the husband didn't. 

At any rate, it seems as though it would still be okay to say "God bless you" because after all, we could all use His blessings anyway.  The sneeze is just a convenient way for us to slip it in there as a reminder.

Real Life Death Race 2000

Every now and then, I'll come across something in the news that just seems WAY too incredulous to believe.  You can read it and/or see it over and over again and it just seems entirely too far-fetched to have actually happened in real life.  We would just like to believe that monsters like this really couldn't exist in the real world.

I'm talking about the story of the man in the McDonald's parking lot in Atlanta who mowed down innocent children and adults in his vehicle.  You can catch the full story here.  The just of it is, he decided that he would run his car up on the curb and take out innocent people with no regards for human life.  And there were children there!  He didn't know any of the parties.  Apparently, he just randomly decided who to do it to.

There are a few things disturbing about the whole incident.  The first is the fact that it was reported by witnesses that he could be visibly seen in his car smiling AND laughing as he was doing all this!  His mother tried to say that he had a history of mental illness.  Ya think?!

But here's the part that really got me.  The cops were called to the scene and ordered the man to get out of his car at gunpoint.  He refused to get out and had to be forcibly removed.  This is after he was just witnessed running over several innocent parties.  I don't know what more just cause they would need to open fire.  Pull the trigger already and put this idiot out of his misery.  Don't even waste our taxpaying money and time on a trial.

People like that are the reason that I'm always extra careful when I'm crossing parking lots with Isaiah.  True, even with as large as I am, my body couldn't sustain the impact of a 3,000 pound vehicle.  Still, maybe I could soften the blow a little.  Maybe I could even have enough reflexes to get out us out of harm's way. 

I'm still just in awe over how callous so many people are out there.  Here we are worrying about terrorists and whatnot and we've got our own citizens here at home doing things like this. 

Day of the Sons

This was one of those days where there just wasn't enough hours in the day to do everything.  It started off with working a half day that involved a three hour management meeting.  I then left from there to get directly on the road to head to Cedar Rapids to check out Elijah's school play that I promised him I would go to.

"Amazing Grace" is based on a book that I had never heard of before.  Apparently, it was pretty well known at Johnson Elementary though.  All those children knew it.  It's the story of a little girl who wants to be in a school play but is discriminated against because of her gender and color.  A pretty big topic for elementary students to tackle and they did it very well.

Elijah played a character called Raj (short for Roger, I'm assuming?). The lead, of course, was girl who played Grace.  However, Elijah did have a lot of speaking and singing lines and he didn't forget a one.  As a matter of fact, I could tell that he was so comfortable with his part that he was even ad-libbing a little. Reminds me of my days in school plays.  I still remember in "Dracula" how me and Roger Benz went so far off script on purpose that the teacher/director nearly had a heart attack.  Who knew that years later, Roger's brother would turn into a borderline psychotic heterophobe?  Oops....got a little sidetracked there...

Anyway, their chorus teacher or some older guy was also in the play.  Kinda' took a bit out of it for me.  The entire cast should have been just students no matter what the part was.

So Elijah now turns into a third generation Fleming actor.  I could tell from watching him that it came naturally for him too.  If he keeps at it on through junior high and high school, he'll only get better and better.  It's just a matter of time before I'm seeing him on the big screen.  I know...fanciful delusions of grandeur but this is my son we're talking about.

I had to go to Elijah's "matinee" performance which was really intended for his schoolmates only.  I couldn't make it to the 7pm one that night because I had to get back in time to see Isaiah's preschool graduation. 

I'm not sure when this whole preschool graduation craze started but it's always amused me.  We never had that when I was in school.  It's really not much of an honor in the bigger scheme of things.  Nevertheless, don't think I wasn't up in there snapping away like he was walking for his doctorate.

All the colors they could have picked for their robes and they would have to with red.  It couldn't be the traditional black or even something a little more neutral...like old gold even.  Nope, it's red.  I don't know what it is, but I just don't like that color.  Fortunately, Zeke looked good in it no matter what color it may have been.

Next year, Zeke will finally be an even bigger boy and will be starting kindergarten at Garton Elementary closer to our house.  Before then, he had the benefit of going to the same preschool as our cousin Aaron, Danielle's son.  Since they live on the other side of town, they won't be going to the same elementary school.  I used to think that would bother him.  Now, I can see that Zeke has the type of personality where he can warm up to anyone so making friends won't be an issue.

So today was pack-filled with activities for it to be a weekday.  Not to mention I still had to get home and watch the Heat play tonight.  Regardless, being that two of the activities involved watching my sons shine, I had no problem at all with trying to manage the hectic schedule.