ModestGeniusXL

And the Winner Is...

A LONG time ago, there was a fleeting thought that crossed my mind to start riding my bike to work.  It was when I was in better shape and worked downtown.  Doing that from my place on Meredith Drive would not have been that much of a stretch.  Although it would have sucked on the way back since it was mostly uphill.  I never did follow through with the idea.

With gas now approaching the $1,000/gallon mark.  I had been thinking about it again.  Unfortunately, now it's more unrealistic than ever before.  Work is a good 10 miles away.  More importantly, I probably weigh twice as much now as I did then.  After reading the story about this guy from Bakersfield, CA, I feel like a chump for not doing it.

Louie Buentiempo also got tired of the escalating gas prices.  With May being bike-to-work month, he decided to put his feet to the peddling instead of the pedal to the metal.  Dude works in downtown Bakersfield but lives in the middle of Techachapi.  That ends up being a 42-mile trip one way for him.  That didn't matter.  He still hits the road with his bike and makes the journey to work.

In order to make this happen, he has to leave at 5am every workday.  The trip one way takes him three hours.  That's some dedication for you right there.  And I thought I was doing good to get up at 5am just so I can get to work by 6:15.  By driving.

I did test my limits just the other day to see if I could pull off something similar.  The fam and I went bike riding on a local bike trail here.  I didn't know it at the time, but the entire trail is approximately 35 miles round trip.  I was able to do approximately 15.  Not too shabby if I must say so myself.  So maybe I could do the bike to work thing?

The problem is a bike trail is primarily flat for most of the way.  There are a few inclines here and there but they are nothing compared to the normal hills run from here to work.  Not to mention that I would be dog tired after getting to work from the long bike commute.  That job is challenging enough without having to combat weariness.

Nevertheless, hats off to this Louis cat.  42 miles one way regardless of the elements is no joke.  So far he has saved $400 that would have normally went into his gas tank.  I'd be a Lance Armstrong biking fool for that kind of money. 

Things to Be Grateful For

Stranger Than Fiction

It's the latest category to surface on this site.  I know, I know...as if I don't have enough of them already.  Heck, there are probably folks that read this that didn't even know you can view my listings by category.  Well now you do!

I figured a little while ago that I would try to get back into writing some fiction to see how it would turn out.  Just a little bit here and there to start with.  Numb got it kicked off and showed some of the rust on my skills.  At least from my self-critique.  But it has been a LONG time since I have penned some fiction so of course I'm a little out of practice.

The latest entry was yesterday's Options.  A bit more melancholy.  I promise they won't all be like that.  However, that's a sign that the skills are coming back.  Once I start going and it's flowing, the fingers start taking over and it just comes out.  It may be somber, it may be jovial.  It just depends.

Eventually, it may evolve into me putting together a novel like I had always wanted to.  Or possibly retooling one I did back in the day.  We will just have to see.  For now, I hope that everyone enjoys the short pieces whenever the mood does strike me to spit one out.

Walk Hard : The Dewey Cox Story

John C. Reilly had played second fiddle long enough.  He pretty much had it down to an art.  There were always the flashes of brilliance when he was playing a supporting actor and/or a sidekick, but could he carry an entire film?  It's not like he has the atypical leading man looks.  With talent like his, it doesn't seem to matter much. 

"Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story" follows the rise and descent of rock and roll icon Dewey Cox (Reilly).  It is a parodic (yes, I just made up another word) take on all the biopic movies we have always seen that trace a performers life from their childhood to their waning years. Complete with all the cliches from those type of films such as kicking drug habits, failed marriages and illegitimate children.

Although they were trying to spoof several different musicians with this film, it's obvious the one they had their sights on was Johnny Cash.  At least the version from "Walk the Line".  This was further evidenced by having Reilly sing his own songs.  I never would have thought that they would be so entertaining, but some of them were the funniest moments in the film.  Almost inspired me to get the soundtrack just to get "Let's Duet" on my Zen.

There are many supporting actors that try their best to steal some of Reilly's shine here.  Tim Meadows is his usual reliable self as Cox's drummer.  However, the best cameos in the film comes when Cox meets the Beatles.  Just the fact that they cast Jack Black to portray Paul McCartney was already humorous.  As if that wasn't enough, Paul Rudd as John Lennon was priceless.

One would not have expected this was yet another project from the mind of Judd Apatow.  A spoof movie is a little off the beaten path of the type of humor he normally provides.  All that does is show a little of his versatility.  Just a little...because there are still obvious Apatow thumbprints all throughout "Walk Hard".  Like again with another male frontal shot.  Judd...come on already!

I had a sneaking suspicion that Reilly had what it takes to pull off a starring role.  All he needed was the right script and a decent cast around him and he could make it work.  He is really the chief reason that "Walk Hard" succeeds.  Ultimately, a clever script and a perfectly comedic Reilly make this film a definite must-see.

My rating:  A-

Options

Hollow point.

Those were the type of bullets best guaranteed to do the trick. She fumbled them in her hand nervously, examining them over and over.  They weren't going to put themselves into the revolver.  Thinking of that made Dyan crack a smile.  Just a little one.  The first one in quite some time.  Yet she still loaded the pistol.

First bullet in.

Statistics say women normally choose a more passive form of suicide.  A less violent method.  But Dyan had always been known to buck the norm so naturally her demise should follow suit.  Plus, it would coincide with her anal retentiveness.  She was known for leaving no task undone so this would guarantee no possibility of return.

Two bullets down.

She had not even fired a gun before.  Not unless you count the excursion she had with her boyfriend and his co-workers to their paintball party.  Dillon was so full himself with all his male bravado over how he dominated Dyan at that activity.  For the first round.  Second round, she had gotten the hang of things and few pellets missed their mark.  He wasn't so cocky after that.

Third bullet is a go.

Good old Dillon.  "D&D" is what everyone called them when they were together.  Dyan mustered a half smirk at that one.  It didn't last long once she remembered catching him sleeping with someone else.  One of his bowling buddies for the past several years.  Jerry.  And he could tell her all he wanted that it was a one time thing, but Dyan knew things like that don't just happen overnight.  The last two years of her life wasted on waiting on a ring for nothing.

Fourth bullet in.

Dyan glanced at the foreclosure notice on the table.  All of the endless conversations she had with the bank came rushing to her.  These same people that were so courteous and friendly to her when she took out the loan had flipped on her.  They conveniently became very callous when Dyan fell on hard times.  Their idea of a "payment plan" was not enough to help a single mother who had just been demoted.

Fifth bullet..check.

Three years she had slaved away at that dead-end job.  Crawling her way up the ranks to even a mediocre supervisor position.  Only so they could bring in some hotshot from the outside with more experience and a degree.  Just so Dyan could train him on what she had been doing.  So he could take her spot.  While she is "reassigned" to another team with less responsibilities.  All because she didn't have a piece of paper from a college.  She was working on it.  It was next on the life plan.  If she could ever get her life together.

Final bullet...

Charlie's photo continued to stare at her from the bookshelf.  His face glowing as if he was ecstatic to be taking that Sixth Grade class picture.  She would miss him the most.  She had already been missing him terribly since the child custody hearing.  His life with his father and the new wife in Florida was better for Charlie though.  That's what the courts told Dyan so that's what she tried to talk herself into believing.  It still didn't stop the tears from flowing everytime she thought about it. 

At least her tears would now end.

I'm So Glad We Had This Time Together...

Good thing I always put up pics with every post or the title alone of this entry could give some the wrong idea.  I'm personally not going anywhere.  Not yet anyway.

Unfortunately, comedy legend Harvey Korman has left us.  He died today at the UCLA Memorial Center after suffering complications from the rupture of an abdominal aortic aneurysm.  He was 81-years-old.

Those folks that have ever watched "The Carol Burnett Show" will know exactly why I gave the post this title.  That was the variety show that truly catapulted Korman into stardom.  He was part of an ensemble cast that made the skit show one of the best of its time. 

The best part of the show was always watching Korman and Tim Conway interact with one another.  Conway's antics would have Korman trying his best to contain his own laughter and that alone made the skit even funnier.

Korman eventually made the natural transition to movies and choose a doozy for one of his first.  His comedic timing and presence was just right for the role of Hedley Lamarr in formver Vault Pick of the Week "Blazing Saddles".  His cameo in "History of the World Part I" was also a personal favorite.  He seemed to do his best work with Mel Brooks.

The big screen didn't turn out to be as kind to him as television was and Korman eventually returned to television.  That's okay though because no matter what his role, he always brought the funny.

Rest in peace, Harv.

The Orphanage (El Orfanato)

Normally, I try to shy away from foreign films with subtitles.  It's not that I discriminate in my cinema, it's just that I don't want to try to be entertained and have to read at the same time.  Afterall, don't we watch movies to in effect take the place of reading?  I have already realized that this may limit my choices and possibly miss some hidden gems.  It is a chance I am willing to take.  But occasionally, I will step outside of my comfort zone.

The good folks over at AICN.com (or maybe it was just the one who wrote the synopsis) were raving about this flick called "The Orphanage".  They went as far as to call it "a genuinely terrifying film".  With a title like that, there was a good chance it would have some of those creepy movie kids that spook me out.  You know I am not about to pass up a good thriller so I was all in.

Laura (Belen Rueda) spent her childhood years in an orphanage with her only friends at the time.  Once she grew into a woman, she convinced her then husband and their adopted son to purchase the now abandoned orphanage and make it their home.  Their eventual goal was to turn it into a facility for disabled children. 

The couple's son Simon starts demonstrating strange behavior after he and his mom go for a walk along the beach.  His "imaginary" friends he had created to keep him company grow slightly in numbers.  Then his disappearance causes Laura to believe that the mysterious surroundings of the eerie orphanage holds more clues than anyone else wants to believe.

Now I can understand on a certain level wanting to live in the house you grew up in. I wouldn't have minded buying the house we grew up in Norwalk and living there.  However, it wasn't some huge, spooky-looking, decrepit orphanage.   That's just insane.  Even if the intention was because they wanted to start a business to help handicapped children.  They could have chosen a location that was possibly less...haunted.

This is one of those rare films where there is no effort made to overpower you with gore, cliche camera shots and/or music to get its effects.  The story itself keeps you so intrigued that when certain things happen such as Laura's chilling discovery, you can feel your hair stand on end.  They leave some pieces to your imagination and it helps to make "The Orphanage" a suspense flick with the entire package.

I didn't realize until it was too late that this was produced by "Pan's Laybrinth" director Guillermo del Toro.  As critically acclaimed as that movie was, the reason I have stayed away from it still was because it's all subtitled.  If "The Orphanage" is a sampling of what he can do, then I may have to suck it up again and watch "Pan's" afterall.

My rating:  A-

Thursday Throwback

Hey Love

Back when BET was still a fledgling network, they didn't have that many advertisers.  In fact, if you watched it late night, it seemed as if they only had one.  This "Hey Love" spot probably played at least three or four times an hour in those early days.  So much so that you would think folks would have had that toll free number memorized.

Pop culture caught on to this one immediately.  "House Party" had a running joke throughout the movie that whenever you would see a television, that commercial was playing.  The name of the cd the commercial was advertising was "Hey Love", but the spot became more commonly known by the trademark phrase uttered at the end... "No, my brother...you've got to get your own!"

Funny thing is this is a commercial from the 80s promoting songs from the 70s.  At the time it was broadcast, that would have been a tight cd to own.  Even now with those songs being over 30 years old, it would STILL be a tight cd.  I wonder if that toll free number still works?

Little Things Peeve a Lot

Let's see...I covered the whole stank breath thing.  I even talked about the eating with your mouth open issue.  Plus I have already addressed several pet peeves in between.  There are a few more that just crossed my mind today that just had to be addressed...

"ATM machine" - Folks do realize that ATM means "automatic teller machine", right?  In other words, you don't go to get money from an automatic teller machine machine.  It's redundant.  Just "ATM" is fine.  You don't need to repeat the final word after already using the proper acronym

"VIN number" -  While we're on the whole redundancy issue...I hear this one at work all the time since we deal with vehicle liability insurance.  The worst part is the biggest violators aren't the customers calling. It's the employees working there!  The ones that are supposed to be educating the customer!  You don't ask for the vehicle identification number number.  Just one time is enough...thank you.

Topping off the soft drink at the free refills dispenser - You do know it's free refills, right?  You don't have to wait for the fizz to go down to maximize your pop volume.  You can always go back and get more.  Even if you couldn't, is going without that extra two milliliters of pop that the fizz occupies really going to kill you?

That is all for now...the short bus is ready for departure...

Toot - Toot - Tootsie, Goodbye

Before Robin Williams did his "Mrs. Doubtfire" thing, there was Dustin Hoffman as "Tootsie".  Dustin looked even more convincing as a woman (granted, a pretty homely one) with much less prosthetics.  It was his performance that sold the part and made "Tootsie" a very funny film. 

"Tootsie"s success was also due largely in part to Sydney Pollack's direction and now he is no longer with us.  Pollack died of cancer in his home Monday night.  He was 73-years-old.

Not only was Pollack a pretty good director, he was a heck of an actor too.  He had a pivotal role in "Tootsie" as Michael Dorsey's (Hoffman) agent.  He made it a habit to have roles in many of the movies he either directed or produced and he never disappointed.

It would be unfair to credit him with just "Tootsie" since Pollack did have an expansive career.  He also directed one of my favorite Tom Cruise films with "The Firm".  As if that wasn't enough, he also has producer credits with hits such as "Leatherheads", "Michael Clayton" and "Absence of Malice", just to mention a few of several.

Thanks for the memories and rest in peace, Syd.

Taking Hating to a Whole Other Level

I know many folks see a video posting and probably don't click on it at all for fear it will be too lengthy. I HIGHLY encourage you to view this one in its entirely.  Plus, it's only 15 seconds long so not too time consuming...

It is this kind of irresponsible journalism that turns me off to watching the mainstream media coverage of this whole election process.  There is NO excuse this interview should have ever continued beyond that point after this idiot proclaimed it would be okay to have Obama assassinated.  The interviewer/producers/SOMEBODY should have abruptly apologized for her stupidity and had her escorted from the studio.

I can deal with morons constantly trying to "accidentally" mispronounce Obama's name and calling "Osama".  They can snicker all they want when they make the mistake as if it was unintentional.  They just make themselves look more stupid.  However, when someone comes out and confesses that it would be okay if he were assassinated, that's just pure hatred that should not be tolerated.

When I first saw this, I had no idea who this Liz Trotta lady was.  I figured she was some alleged political analyst FOX news was interviewing for kicks.  Nope.  Apparently she works for them!  Folks are always saying how shady FOX news is and there now couldn't be better proof than this. 

Below are two very important links.  The first is a petition to have her fired.  It's the least FOX news can do to compensate for this egregious screw-up.  Not sure how effective it would be, but it is worth a shot.  The second is a place you can file a complaint with the FCC for her inappropriate comment.  At the very least, FOX should be reprimanded for allowing this woman to air.  PLEASE click on these and make our voice known:

Fire the moron formerly known as Liz Trotta

Report Liz Trotta's sorry behind to the FCC

It's ironic because just the other day, it crossed my mind for the first time in a while that Obama's life is in danger on a constant basis.  There was a newscast of one of his upcoming appearances and they mentioned that Secret Service had just finished their security sweep.  That's when it dawned on me that his historic run could have fatal consequences.  I pray that it doesn't, but for as much as the United States has changed, there are still some folks out there who want to continue living in the bloody past.