Those were the type of bullets best guaranteed to do the trick. She fumbled them in her hand nervously, examining them over and over. They weren't going to put themselves into the revolver. Thinking of that made Dyan crack a smile. Just a little one. The first one in quite some time. Yet she still loaded the pistol.
First bullet in.
Statistics say women normally choose a more passive form of suicide. A less violent method. But Dyan had always been known to buck the norm so naturally her demise should follow suit. Plus, it would coincide with her anal retentiveness. She was known for leaving no task undone so this would guarantee no possibility of return.
Two bullets down.
She had not even fired a gun before. Not unless you count the excursion she had with her boyfriend and his co-workers to their paintball party. Dillon was so full himself with all his male bravado over how he dominated Dyan at that activity. For the first round. Second round, she had gotten the hang of things and few pellets missed their mark. He wasn't so cocky after that.
Good old Dillon. "D&D" is what everyone called them when they were together. Dyan mustered a half smirk at that one. It didn't last long once she remembered catching him sleeping with someone else. One of his bowling buddies for the past several years. Jerry. And he could tell her all he wanted that it was a one time thing, but Dyan knew things like that don't just happen overnight. The last two years of her life wasted on waiting on a ring for nothing.
Fourth bullet in.
Dyan glanced at the foreclosure notice on the table. All of the endless conversations she had with the bank came rushing to her. These same people that were so courteous and friendly to her when she took out the loan had flipped on her. They conveniently became very callous when Dyan fell on hard times. Their idea of a "payment plan" was not enough to help a single mother who had just been demoted.
Three years she had slaved away at that dead-end job. Crawling her way up the ranks to even a mediocre supervisor position. Only so they could bring in some hotshot from the outside with more experience and a degree. Just so Dyan could train him on what she had been doing. So he could take her spot. While she is "reassigned" to another team with less responsibilities. All because she didn't have a piece of paper from a college. She was working on it. It was next on the life plan. If she could ever get her life together.
Charlie's photo continued to stare at her from the bookshelf. His face glowing as if he was ecstatic to be taking that Sixth Grade class picture. She would miss him the most. She had already been missing him terribly since the child custody hearing. His life with his father and the new wife in Florida was better for Charlie though. That's what the courts told Dyan so that's what she tried to talk herself into believing. It still didn't stop the tears from flowing everytime she thought about it.
At least her tears would now end.